The Monster Mash

Hello Boils and Ghouls. It's time to unpack that perennial favorite - that creepy cool king of Halloween - The Monster Mash.

Arguably the most popular song for Halloween howling, The Monster Mash is the one track that you can expect to appear on every All Hallow's party playlist. In fact, that venerable ghoul, Dr. Demento, called it "The biggest Halloween song of all time."

Catchy, fun, and instantly likable with a 1960's vibe, The Mash fires on all cylinders, and nothing can get you in the spooky mood faster than the opening creek of the castle door, the bubbling cauldron, the rattling chains, and those echoing footsteps...

The song was written in 1962 by Robert George Pickett, also known as Bobby "Boris" Pickett. 

Bobby got the nickname "Boris" because of his spot-on Boris Karloff impersonation.  During the day he was an actor and at night he sang with a Do-Wop group known as:

 One night, Bobby was joking around, and did a Karloff impersonation while performing with the band. One of his band mates, Lenny Capizzi, thought it was awesome and encouraged him to do more. In fact, ol' Bob (as he liked to be called*), did an entire monologue in the Karloff voice.

This led to Pickett and Capizzi to sit down and within about 30 minutes they had written the song. 

 The narrative is one of a mad scientist who brings a Frankenstein monster to life on a stormy night. When the monster gets off the slab, he does a dance, which becomes a "monster" hit across the country. Soon other monsters come to a party where Dracula laments the demise of his "Transylvania Twist"*.

The song was recorded with  a who's who of seasoned professional musicians, and dubbed them: The Crypt-Kicker Five.

Here are the lyrics, in case you missed them:

I was working in the lab late one night
When my eyes beheld an eerie sight
For my monster from his slab began to rise
And suddenly to my surprise

He did the mash
He did the monster mash
The monster mash
It was a graveyard smash
He did the mash
It caught on in a flash
He did the mash
He did the monster mash

From my laboratory in the castle east
To the master bedroom where the vampires feast
The ghouls all came from their humble abodes
To get a jolt from my electrodes

They did the mash
They did the monster mash
The monster mash
It was a graveyard smash
They did the mash
It caught on in a flash
They did the mash
They did the monster mash

The zombies were having fun
The party had just begun
The guests included Wolf Man
Dracula and his son

The scene was rockin', all were digging the sounds
Igor on chains, backed by his baying hounds
The coffin-bangers were about to arrive
With their vocal group, "The Crypt-Kicker Five"

They played the mash
They played the monster mash
The monster mash
It was a graveyard smash
They played the mash
It caught on in a flash
They played the mash
They played the monster mash

Out from his coffin, Drac's voice did ring
Seems he was troubled by just one thing
He opened the lid and shook his fist
And said, "Whatever happened to my Transylvania twist"

It's now the mash
It's now the monster mash
The monster mash
And it's a graveyard smash
It's now the mash
It's caught on in a flash
It's now the mash
It's now the monster mash

Now everything's cool, Drac's a part of the band
And my monster mash is the hit of the land
For you, the living, this mash was meant too
When you get to my door, tell them Boris sent you

Then you can mash
Then you can monster mash
The monster mash
And do my graveyard smash
Then you can mash
You'll catch on in a flash
Then you can mash
Then you can monster mash

The effects were done on the cheap. The castle door creaking was a nail in a board, the cauldron and scientific equipment was blowing through a straw into a glass of water, and the chains were ordinary dog leashes, rattled and tossed about.

The song was immediately successful and cracked the top ten in December of 1962. Bobby was thrilled with the results, but was surprised when there was a revival of the tunes in the 70's. The song hit the Billboard charts again in 1970 and 1973. In fact, Pickett is the only performer whose original recording hit the top 100 three separate times.

To show you how much times have changed, the song was banned in Great Britain in 1962, for being too morbid... 

BTW, did you know that Pickett's original backup band was a group of young unknown guys called: "The Beach Boys"? 

There are lots of other interesting facts about Pickett and the song. The truth is out there... if you look for it.

Pickett kept performing the song live and fully embraced it until his death from leukemia in 2007. Here is a video of one of the live performances. It's really great to see him on stage with the "Ghoul of Cool", Zacherley. We'll talk more about him on another post.

Zacherley is a late-night talk show host, who made his own albums and was featured by Rob Zombie on his Halloween Hootenanny album. He recorded a ton of horror songs and is a must for any fear aficionado. 

It was so successful that it spawned two sequels: Monster Holiday and Monster Rap. Neither could reach the success of the Mash.

 

In the end, the song has become a staple of spookiness. Various books have illustrated its story and there even was a movie made, starring Pickett. It says it was written by the co-writers of Toy Story.

It has Candace Cameron as one of the main stars. In fact, I demand you watch it, right now:

The Monster Mash has been covered by over 100 groups. Here is a small sampling...

First up, is a Metallica rip-off, heavy metal Monster Mash version:

Next we have the delightfully punky version as recorded by The Misfits:

Here is a folksy acoustic version that I kinda dig:

Last, but definitely not least, is one of my favorites. We have the Master of Horror, Vincent Price, serenading some ghouls:

So there you have it. Everything you never wanted to know about The Monster Mash. Go get the album and rock it, hard!

*nobody ever called him that, to my knowledge. 
** which was also Pickett, doing his best Lugosi impersonation. 

Bert Convy's The Monster Hop

Howdy Kiddies! 

Well, Halloween is now in full swing. I know it's only the end of August, but go into any store and you'll begin to see orange and black beginning to seep in. In fact, some leaves are already starting to shed their summer outfits for something a little more comfortable, in my neck of the woods. Add to that the fact that Matt from DinosaurDracula will taking his annual Halloween countdown live this Saturday, and you've got a season on the cusp of full bloom. 

It's time to really begin working on your Halloween playlist, not just for a night of spooking wary trick or treaters, but for your amazingly spooktacular party. You are having a Halloween party, right?

So far, we've given you a decent primer. Now let's add some paint.

The first song to really enlighten me about the world of monster music beyond the Purple People Eater, The Mash, and Werewolves of London, was Burt Convy's The Monster Hop.

I first discovered this song on the Monster Bop compilation.

This album deserves its own seperateblog. I plan on posting that later this week, but today, I want to talk specifically about Convy's main contribution to this fine collection.

The Monster Hop is a wonderfully spooky ultrasonic treat. I still remember the first time I heard the bass line. It was deliciously late 50's in tone. My ears perked up. What was this? It was something new. Up until this point, I thought I knew most of the standard Samhain song selection, but with the first trills of brass and those ghostly, "ooohhhh"'s, my whole world was about to explode with new monstrous goodies.

Take a listen:

As you can hear, it is a marvelous song for Halloween. Here are the lyrics, in case you missed them:

I heard strange noises coming from a house on the hill 

So I crept up to the window and looked over the sill 

My heart almost stopped, I nearly died of fright 

By the dim candlelight I saw the strangest sight 

There was Frankenstein and Dracula and Wolfman too 

Dancin' with some zombies, what a ghastly crew 

The ol' ugly vampire was doing the bop 

And everything was rocking at the monster's hop 

The bats were flying and the room was full 

The crazy witch doctor was dancing with a ghoul 

The organ was playing, but no-one was there 

And the headless horseman was combing his hair 

There was Frankenstein and Dracula and Wolfman too 

Dancin' with some zombies, what a ghastly crew 

The ol' ugly vampire was doing the bop 

And everything was rocking at the monster's hop 

I can't forget that empty house upon the hill 

The night has fall, the monsters dance and oh what a thrill 

The wind did howl, the night was black

I nearly lost my mind, I'm never ever going back 

There was Frankenstein and Dracula and Wolfman too 

Dancin' with some zombies, what a ghastly crew 

The ol' ugly vampire was doing the bop 

And everything was rocking at the monster's hop

Are your spide senses tingling?  What a Halloweeny song, right? I loved the callback to just about every classic monster that Burt could envoke. 

The song was recorded in 1958, at the height of the monster craze. Burt started as a minor league baseball player, but left the game and pursued music after just two seasons.

He joined a 50's rock n roll group called The Cheers, and in 1955 they had a top ten hit called Black Denim Trousers and Motorcycle Boots.

 The band broke up in '57 and Convy recorded The Monster Hop in 1958 for Contender Records. He also recorded another creepy track known as Gorilla. 

Around this time, he also caught the attention of Roger Corman, who cast him in his cult classic, A Bucket of Blood, forever cementing him as a favorite with the horror community.

 Burt went on to become a fairly familiar television host for such shows as Super Password, and Tattletales. He even formed a production company with Burt Reynolds called, Burt and Bert Productions. Their first production was Win, Lose, or Draw, which Bert (Convey, not Reynolds) hosted.

Sadly, Convy died in 1991, from an aggressive brain tumor.

So, that's way more information than most of you probably wanted to know about a 2:29 second blip on your playlist. But add it to your playlist, you should. (said Yoda). It is a marvelous song, perfect for All Hallow's Eve and beyond, and a quintessential piece of 50's monster music.

Alright, enough of this nonsense. Tune in next time as we explore the wonders of the entire Monster Bop album.

 

Strange Things are Afoot at the Kum and Go (A Halloween Oreo Egg Review)

 

 A bizarrely named convenience store might be the last place you'd expect to find Halloween goodness on the 17th of August, but if you should learn anything in this crazy world we live in, it is not to judge based upon appearances.

I walked in today, completely unsuspecting of the tresaures that I'd find. In fact, I just wanted a beverage. But when I meandered over to ye ol' candy aisle, I was struck with spooky spectacles! 

Now, at first glance of this picture, you may be thinking, "Yeah? So, what?!?"

Look closer.

We have all kinds of goodies, here. We have Resse's pumpkins, Hershey's Candy Corn Bars, and Cauldron Skittles. 

The Cauldron Skittles were interesting, but I wish they'd done more with the bag than put a cauldron at the bottom that looked like it had been appropriated for a LGBQT parade.

They tried to give some spooky flavors like Petrified Pear and Gripping Grape, but this was kind of a half-hearted attempt, if you ask me.

Where are the bats? The cats? The skulls? The pumpkins? 

The M&M's Ghoul's Mix was better. Not only did we get a cool mummy Peanut M&M guy, but I'm digging the colors of the candy, itself. Very Halloweeny.

Next, we move on to the spooky KitKat collection. There are four spooky bar designs, hidden in bat-encrusted, season-appropriate packages. 

I approve.

In fact, I bought one of the bars. I haven't opened it, yet, but when I do, I will post a pic in the comments. I know, what kind of fiend toys with you by purchasing a decorated Halloween candy and then not having the decency to even open the package and post the appropriate pic?

Well, one who has overdosed on extremely sweet new candy, which I will show you below, thank you, very much.

Butterfinger brought back their peanut butter skull Cups. I love these things, but I was on a hunt, today. 

And low and behold! There, stacked between the underwhelming cauldron Skittles and some groovy Frankenstein Bubble Tape, was the first Holy Grail of the year, this year's most celebrated new treat, ladies and gentlemen I give you: The Oreo Halloween Egg. *

Recently, holidays and eggs have gone together like toast and bacon. No longer just satisfied with Easter, Cadbury has decided that every holiday needs a creme egg. I wouldn't be surprised if soon they have an Arbor Day creme egg that you can plant and have a small tree sprout.

Not to be undone, Oreo has created a Halloween Egg. This one is smaller than your average Creme Egg, as you can see in the picture, below.

Obviously, I had to have it. I couldn't very well leave without having one of these eggs in my possession. I snagged it and went straight to my tasting laboratory (a.k.a. my car).

The first thing I noticed was the nifty little Dracula that overlooked the logo, like a protective vampire mother, watching over her little baby (or egg, in this case).

There are actually three different packages. The other two are a pumpkin and ghost. **

They all look fun. I grabbed the vampire by random, but will go back and get the other two before they are all snagged.

The description promised Creme filled candy with cookie pieces! 

Oodelally! That's right up my alley. I eager unwrapped it, and was... confused.

It looked like "chocolate". But the package didn't call it "chocolate". The package called it "candy". What was this sorcery?!?

Tentatively, I took a bite. Nope, not exactly chocolate - at least quality chocolate. I'm not here to slander, but there was something decidedly caroby about the texture and taste.

One of my first impressions was: SWEET!

I don't mean sweet as in the 80's term of endearment concerning something totally righteous. I mean sweet as in diabetes. This thing has sugar and you can feel it attacking your pancreas with every single caroby*** bite.

The creme was classic cookies n cream and there was a satisfying thickness to the thing. I wasn't disappointed in the bite that I took, but I wasn't sure I could take another. This thing is not something I will eat in one setting.

So, yes, I recommend the egg. It tasted good, enough. It wasn't amazing, and certainly isn't better than the classic Cadbury creme egg, but it's worth picking one up, if you see one out and about.

On my way out, I saw something that made my heart happy:

If you understand why this appealed to the Hallow-trickster in me, then we can be friends.

* which I will affectionately refer to as Boooreo!

** I didn't realize this when I grabbed my little Dracula****. I was in a hurry and just picked one.

*** Any claims that the shell is carob is completely unsubstantiated.

**** That came out dirtier than I meant it to.

Now That's What I Call Halloween!

And now for something a little different. Are you a Halloween newbie? Are you just starting your cadaverous collection of spooky songs and horrifying hits? Does the daunting task of making your own playlist fill you with... dread?

If the answer to these questions is, "yes", then we have a great way to prime the pump. Of course, I'm speaking of 2015's glorious release: NOW, That's What I Call Halloween!, from the fun fiends behind the NOW, That's What I Call Music series by Universal and Sony (often referrred to as NOW).

NOW, That's What I Call Halloween! (or as it will be hither referred to as NTWICH! in order to appease my carpal tunnel) is NOW's first foray into fright. Yes, they brought us such classics as NOW, That's What I Call Country!, NOW, That's What I Call Motown!, NOW, That's What I Call Music Volume 61!, NOW, That's What I Call Mum!, and the immortal NOW, That's What I Call Christmas! In spite of all these instant classics, they had yet to provide a Halloween compilation, until... wait for it.... NOW!

Anyway, I think it was worth the wait, as this is an excellent primer into the world of All Hallow's atmospheric songs. I think you'll agree that the track list is pretty impressive, so let's go over it, shall we?

	Halloween Theme (Main Title) by John Carpenter
	Dragula by Rob Zombie
	Carmina burana: O Fortuna by Leonard Slatkin
	Tubular Bells (Theme from 'The Exorcist') by Mike Oldfield
	(Don't Fear) The Reaper (Single Version) by Blue Oyster Cult
	Devil Inside by Inxs
	Bad Things by Jace Everett
	Werewolves of London by Warren Zevon
	Ghost Town by The Specials
	Dead Man's Party by Oingo Boingo
	Monster Mash by Bobby Boris Pickett & the Crypt-Kickers
	This Is Halloween by the Citizens of Halloween
	Season of the Witch by Donovan
	I Put a Spell On You by Nina Simone
	Beetlejuice: Main Title / End Title by Danny Elfman
	Ghostbusters by RUN-DMC
	A Nightmare On My Street by DJ Jazzy Jeff & The Fresh Prince
	Somebody's Watching Me (Single Version) by Rockwell

Now, that's what I call a Halloween playlist! We've got the creme de la creme of Samhain themes, the immortal Halloween Main Title. We have Werewolves of London, now with more fur. We have the crashing chains of The Monster Mash, more cowbell with Don't Fear the Reaper, and Rob Zombie's ode to yesterday's article about The Munsters; Dragula.

While these staples are absolutely fantastic, it's the off-the-wall oddities that I'm really excited about. Why go for the boring old original Ghostbusters by Mr. Charles, Jr, when you can blast the Run-DMC, remix?  Plus you have Bad Things, which just might be the dirtiest Halloween song that will appear on this blog. Seriously, that song is full of filthy intent and smutty subtext.

We will be going through all of these songs eventually, but in the meantime, you owe it to yourself to pick up NTWICH! and start plowing through the tunes. You can find it here: NOW, That's What I Call Halloween!

NOW, I can't finish an article without providing a video, or two. Wanna see a commercial for the disc? Of course you do. Here it is.

  
And HERE is a link to a youtube playlist so you can sample all of the songs before you get the album. 

Lastly, I am going to post a direct video of my favorite track, the grandaddy of them all, and absolutely essential for any night of trick or treating. What's your favorite? Sound off below.